People Are Awesome.
One afternoon in 2009 on Twitter
@
pheezy
1. Keep them away from water 2. They hate bright light 3. The most
important rule. Never feed them after midnight. #mogwaiPhone
June 10th
@
ads_infinitum
Plant in loose soil. Water as needed. Prune regularly. #bonsaiPhone
June 10th
@
pheezy
FIND KAT IMAGE. MAK UP CAPSHUN & PIPE THRU SPEAKLOLCAT.COM SET AS IFONE WALLPAPR. #oh_haiPhone
June 10th
@
sampotts
1. Drop call. 2. Drop call. 3. Drop call. 4. Drop call. 5. Drop call. 7. Drop call. 8. Go down to edge of the river. 9. Throw. #bye_byePhone
June 10th
@
VictoriaMia
shows 36 views of Mt Fuji #hokusaiPhone Creeps out your friends #hentaiPhone
June 10th
@
sampotts
Just wants to cuddle. #nice_guyPhone
June 10th
@
ads_infinitum
Corncob pipe. Can o' spinach. He yis what he yis. #popeyePhone
June 10th
@
marshalkowski
1.Divide into circumference. 2. Find radius #piPhone
June 10th
@
TapiocaNaif
Allows you to pair with another device and swap or splice the DNA of the users. #brundleflyPhone
June 10th
@
tonyfaulkner
Big in the nineties, dances goofily, wears big hats. #JamiroquaiPhone
June 10th
@
hanov3r
black screen, white prompt says "$" #cliPhone
June 10th
@
hanov3r
use phone to lift X-wing #there_is_no_tryPhone
June 10th
@
mitch_j
Cancelled before its time #fireflyPhone
June 10th
@
mitch_j
Often golfs, flys or does other jokeworthy activities with priests. #rabbiPhone
June 10th
@
joeippolito
Eats three bags of Doritos and falls asleep. #gets_highPhone
June 10th
@
joeippolito
1. Study 18th Century Babylonian history. 2. Download "Hammurabi" app. 3. Inflict justice. #eye_for_an_eyePhone
June 10th
@
intellijen
do, or do not #there_is_no_tryPhone
June 10th
@
RadioBabe
Everything comes out distorted. #liePhone
June 10th
@
ads_infinitum
Didn't have Ice Cube, so he bought Vanilla Ice. #pretty_fly_for_a_white_guyPhone
June 10th
@
sampotts
The whippoorwill sounds too blue to fly. The midnight train is whining low. #so_lonesome_i_could_cryPhone
June 10th
@
RadioBabe
reveals all your secrets. #hang_you_out_to_dryPhone.
June 10th
@
RadioBabe
Best for collecting gossip: #I_don't_mean_to_pryPhone
June 10th
@
joeippolito
1. Changes name to weird symbol. 2. Just like its father. 3. Never satisfied. 4. Screams at other phones. #when_doves_cryPhone
June 10th
@
joeippolito
Soaks up more liquid than other leading communication devices. #two_plyPhone
June 10th
@
RadioBabe
Canta y no llores. #ay_ay_ay_ayPhone
June 10th
@
sampotts
Had free time. Signed up for Twitter. No more has free time. #why_oh_whyPhone
June 10th
@
sampotts
Strap on helmet. Lash basket thing to arm. Whip phone against the wall at 200mph. #jai_alaiPhone
June 10th
@
LaurenSelfor
from "Purple Rain" #when_doves_cryPhone
June 10th
@
jonsel
iTunes wouldn't download my fav nsync songs. Threw phone away in a rage. #bye_bye_byePhone
June 10th
@
marshalkowski
1. Drive Chevy to levee. 2. Levee is dry. 3. Join good ol' boys. 4. Drink whisky and rye. #miss_american_piePhone
June 10th
@
jonsel
Sheena is a punk rocker! #rock_and_roll_highPhone
June 10th
@
mel21clc
Wears matching outfits, performs choreographed dances. It might sound crazy but it ain't no lie #byebyebyePhone
June 10th
@
joeippolito
1. Develops middling R&B career. 2. Does unspeakable things with underage women. #I_believe_I_can_flyPhone
June 10th
@
jonsel
Phone is big hit. Tours country. Dies in tragic plane crash. #bye_bye_miss_american_piePhone
June 10th
@
heyjuke
he gets no love from me; tries to holler at me as he hangs out the
passenger side of his best friend's ride #a_scrub_is_a_guyPhone
June 10th
@
joeippolito
Comes standard with war-ending app. #treaty_of_VersaillesPhone
June 10th
@
TapiocaNaif
Provides transcriptions of song lyrics as interpreted by Frank Zappa #excuse_me_while_I_kiss_this_guyPhone
June 10th
@
burtmonroe
Only JD Salinger may own one. All others sued. #catcher_in_the_rye_phone
June 10th
@
Peter000
Cool, refreshing, with a hint of spice. #iced_chaiPhone
June 10th
@
ads_infinitum
Available in black *and* white. #spy_vs_spyPhone
June 10th
@
jonsel
Seen on very cool digital sandwich board. #the_end_is_nighPhone
June 10th
@
danthorne
Out of toilet paper? There's an app for that. #two-plyphone
June 10th
@
jonsel
Superman? #look!_up_in_the_skyPhone
June 10th
@
larrylegend
there's pus coming out of your eyelid #styPhone
June 10th
@
Peter000
must... make... call! #do_or_diePhone
June 10th
@
larrylegend
delicious drink for post-yoga class, pre-pick up kids at soccer #vanilla_chaiPhone
June 10th
@
joeippolito
British edition: 1. Builds bridge. 2. Betrays friend. 3. Wonders what it has done. 4. Detonates. #bridge_on_the_river_kwaiPhone
June 10th
@
heyjuke
is typical with chinese food: add ingredients, a little oil and stir continously over high heat #stir_fryPhone
June 10th
@
jonsel
Tasty, but only during Passover. #matzoh_breiPhone
June 10th
@
LaurenSel
Siam, sadly, is no longer a country, #the_King_and_I_phone
June 10th
@
TJMcCandless
Stuck with my Verizon contract for now - no success with their customer service goon squad. #dont_even_want_to_tryPhone
June 10th
@
jonsel
Sosa. McGwire. Manny. #deny_deny_denyPhone
June 10th
@
heyjuke
you are my fire, my one desire... believe when I say: I want it that way #tell_me_whyPhone
June 10th
@
jonsel
Hey Geppetto, that's quite a big schnoz your kid has. #never_tell_a_liePhone
June 10th
@
mitch_j
One Hit Wonder #too_shy_shyPhone OR #one_more_tryPhone OR #one_toke_over_the_linePhone OR #pretty_little_angel_eyesPhone OR
June 10th
@
LaurenSel
listening to some vintage REO Speedwagon #time_for_me_to_flyphone
June 10th
@
jonsel
Not sure dating the youngsters was a good career move. #i_believe_i_can_flyPhone
June 10th
@
DaynaR
Dat's amore! #when_the_moon_hits_your_eye_like_a_big_pizza_piePhone
June 10th
@
twoboysmomma
and I'm enjoying it, ordered mine ystrdy! #cant_wait_to_get_myphone
June 10th
@
BStephenson
Ready or not, here I come. Gee, that used to be such fun! #apple_peaches_punkin_piePhone
June 10th
@
jonsel
Just think of the little kids dancing in the slums! #jaiPhone
June 10th
@
ads_infinitum
Drove my Chevy to the levy but the levy was dry. #american_piePhone
June 10th
@
ads_infinitum
Don't blame it on us. Blame it on the boogie. #jackson_fivePhone
June 10th
@
knickerbockerny
two kinds of rum, curacao, Orgeat, rock candy & lime; rocks and a Trader Vic's swizzle stick. #mai_taiPhone.
June 10th
@
pheezy
Walk into Katz's. Get your ticket marked up with grease pencil. #pastrami_on_ryePhone
June 10th
@
ajbezark
Of course: Drives Chevy to Levy, but Levy is Dry #bye_bye_miss_american_piephone
June 10th
@
joeippolito
1. Is gone, can't come back, is out of the blue and into the black. 2.
Predicts rock and roll will never die. #hey_hey_my_myPhone
June 10th
@
MissBreitberg
It is diamond-encrusted...the Lucy In The SkyPhone
June 10th
@
TJMcCandless
Moe, Curly and Larry each have one. Doink. #gonna_poke_you_in_the_eyePhone
June 10th
@
sarahindie
Need to chop down a cherry tree? There's an app for that. #cannot_tell_a_liePhone
June 10th
@
Merbrat
Virtual or button qwerty. #BiPhone
June 10th
@
Merbrat
From the "Princess Line"...the DiPhone (um, that was a style of landline phones)
June 10th
@
kaleidoplex
Where kissing in public is illegal #welcome_to_the_DubaiPhone
June 10th
@
sampotts
Blonde New Wave queen is gonna be your number one. #tide_is_highPhone
June 10th
@
michelediane
toothpick included #Swiss_army_kniPhone
June 10th
@
Peter000
Do you expect me to talk?
#no_mr_bond_i_expect_you_to_diePhone
June 10th
@
mel21clc
Can be used as eye-hitting device to indicate amore. #big-pizza-piePhone
June 10th
@
GuildSteersman
The alien menace descends upon earth #Holy_mackerel_Look_at_the_sky_phone!
June 10th
@
ableparris
Double Bacon Cheeseburger #would_you_like_friesPhone
June 10th
@
LaurenSel
for Charles Bukowski fans, there's the ham_on_ryephone... ok, I think I'm done now.
June 10th
@
ableparris
Cross you heart, hope to die. #stick_ a_needle_in_your_eyePhone
June 10th
@
cunabula
Tied to a single network and faced with a ridiculously expensive upgrade #why_why_whyphone
June 10th
@
rmarotti
a dainty gadget to set before the king. #4_and_20_blackbirds_baked_in_a_piePhone
June 10th
@
TapiocaNaif
The Champagne of Phones #The Miller_High_LiPhone
June 10th
@
Peter000
This is mutiny, Mr. Christian!
#Captain_BlighPhone
June 10th
@
kaleidoplex
Your last appeal has been denied. #Now_You're_Going_To_FryPhone
June 10th
@
jinime
Friday is the DTV transition deadline. Is it too early to wish for a streaming television app? #the_end_is_nighPhone
June 10th
@
kaleidoplex
Some creep decides to make a move on you. #Don't_Take_This_Wrong_But_I'd_Rather_DiePhone
June 10th
@
jonsel
The Yanks lost to the Sox. Again. #sighPhone
June 10th
@
gregbrainos
The 3.14159265 megapixels on this device make for delicious pictures #PiPhone
June 10th
@
johngrogg
Jacob, to Hurley: #Charlie_says_hiPhone
June 11th
@
intellijen
moses, god called and would like a word. sounds kinda pissed #mtsinaiPhone
June 11th
@
ads_infinitum
According to Journey, it keeps on turning. Don't know where you'll be tomorrow? There's an app for that. #wheel_in_the_skyPhone
June 11th
@
ads_infinitum
Stars Toshiro Mifune. Recruits ronin. Defends your village. #seven_samuraiPhone #I_can't_believe_this_is_still_going
June 11th
@
fengypants
A bugbear attacks. Roll for dexterity. #20_sided_diePhone #probably_not_right_its_too_late_or_too_early
June 11th
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@
ceceliahouse
comes with great children's books, but you don't have to take MY word for it #butterflyintheskyphone #icanflytwiceashighphone
June 11th
@
joeippolito
Befriends Christopher Lloyd, rides in a DeLorean, travels through time, battles Biff. #marty_mcflyPhone
June 11th
@
etagelarsen
stick'em up! #your_money_or_your_liPhone
June 11th
@
jonsel
ToP no more. #the_inkwell_has_run_dryPhone
June 11th
@
TJMcCandless
Hey - your closing message is dated June 12! #how_fast_the_day_went_byPhone
June 11th
@
earth2marsh
One day it will cook my meals and do my laundry. #PieInTheSkyPhone
June 11th
@
Peter000
"Something 7.2Mbps HSDPA Compliant." #I_spy_with_my_little_eyePhone_S
June 11th
@
Peter000
White blows up Black. Black blows up White. Black and White blow up each other. #Spy_Vs_SpyPhone
June 11th
@
nicoleseiffert
Lie detection 2.: #cross_my_heart_hope_to_die_stick_a_needle_in_my_eyePhone.
June 11th
@
MissBreitberg
Isn't there an app for that on your I_Can_Do_Anything_If_I_Just_TryPhone?
June 11th
_sonyaa
had a bad day? there's an app for that. #f_my_liPhone
June 13th
jonsel
Hung out in the sun too long? #need_to_set_your_SPF_on_hiPhone
June 15th
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